Answers to pressing questions of life

Dear Kafi, I am on the horns of a moral and mental dilemma. To make it short: I am pregnant. My whole inside struggles against this child. I have already two wonderful boys and I adore them. Both are still quite small but just old enough I could start to work again. No, I don’t need any moralizers telling me that I should have prevented better. It has happened and now I am quite torn. On the one hand I really think nothing of abortion. But on the other hand I am not happy about the baby and I don’t love the father either. I think he is a good person but really not mature enough to take on the responsibility for a child. He isn’t even able to manage his own life. Also, I don’t think we have any prospects as a couple because, as I said, I have only friendly senses of him. Now, I must take a really important decision in less time. Am I having this baby or not? I had to handle everything on my own once already with my two boys and this has finally led to a divorce. And I don’t want to go through this again. I am terribly afraid to have to go through this once again. And I fear that I won’t make it. I fear that I will not be able to love this child the way it would earn it. But there’s also the fear of an abortion. The fear of costs I may not be able to bear. And there may also be the burden of mental and moral aspects. There’s not much time left to decide. What do you think about this, Kafi? What would you do? Kind regards. Selina, 27

Tue, 05/02/2017 - 18:58

Dear Selina,

You have asked me this question more than a week ago, and I hope very much that my answer isn’t too late. Reading your words, I can feel and share your despair. You are really not in an easy situation. And to be under pressure of time doesn’t make it easier either. Nevertheless, I cannot relieve you of the decision and I will not tell you how I would act if I were you. This decision is a too important one to make it based on the opinion of a stranger.